MANDUR

Dua orang yang berjiran berbicara mengenai pekerjaan, ketika salah seorang bertanya, "Mengapa mandur perusahaan memecatmu?"

Balas orang kedua, "Hmm, kamu tahu kan bagaimana seorang mandur selalu berdiri, berkeliling dan melihat yang lain melakukan perkerjaan. Mandur saya cemburu, kerana orang mulai berfikir bahawa saya adalah mandur."


E-KETAWA

INI GAMBAR SIAPA?

Seorang wanita telah mengajak teman lelakinya ke rumahnya supaya dapat berdua-duaan di malam minggu. Jadi teman lelakinya bersetuju. Tau-tau sajalah apa yang dia orang buat di malam minggu tu berdua-duaan di dalam bilik wanita tu….. kira malam minggu tu milik dia oranglah. Selepas selesai melakukan adengan yang dicensoredkan, si lelaki ni pun berehat sambil mengambil rokoknya tapi mancis takder.

Bertanyalah si lelaki ni kepada teman wanitanya; “Darling! ada mancis tak?”. Ada kat dalam laci sebelah katil tu”, jawab si wanita tu. Masa buka laci tu,terpandanglah si lelaki tu sebuah potret lelaki di dalam laci tu. Bertanyalah si lelaki tu pada teman wanitanya; “Gambar siapa ni yang? Gambar suami sayang ker? “Bukan” jawab si wanita tu. “Kalau bukan gambar suami sayang, gambar tunang sayang ker?”, “Bukan jugak” jawab wanita tu lagi. “Kalau bukan jugak, habis gambar ni gambar siapa?” tanya silelaki tu untuk mendapat penjelasan lanjut “Yanggg! Gambar tu adalah gambar saya sebelum saya menjalani pembedahan jantina” jawab si wanita tu dengan penuh manja.

AAAaaaawwWW?

BY ANONYMOUS

KASIH SEORANG SUAMI

Kisah Kasih Suami Pada Isteri Pak Mat adalah seorang penduduk sebuah pondok di Selatan Thailand. Pada pertengahan bulan Mei yang lalu isterinya yang bernama Maznah telah meninggal dunia kerana diserang penyakit jantung.

Pak Mat yang berusia menjangkau empat puluhan telah diperhatikan oleh jiran-jirannya agak luar biasa iaitu beliau telah pergi ke kubur isterinya sebanyak tiga kali sehari. Pak Mat pergi pada waktu pagi, tengah hari dan petang untuk menyiram kubur isterinya lebih dari dua minggu secara berterusan. Ada setengah dari jiran dan penduduk tempatan beranggapan Pak Mat begitu cintakan isterinya.

Seorang saudaranya yang terdekat telah berkata, "Awak ni terlalu sangat cintakan isteri sehingga sanggup berbuat demikian, yang mana tak ada siapa lagi di kampung ini buat begitu." Pak Mat menjawab, "sebenarnya sebelum Maznah hendak menghembuskan nafas yang terakhirnya, beliau telah berpesan kepada saya, kalau hendak kahwin pun tunggulah sehingga rumput di kuburnya tumbuh dahulu." " Oleh yang demikian saya terpaksa siram kuburnya supaya rumput cepat tumbuh......"

BY ANONYMOUS

3 SAHABAT BAIK..

Pada suatu hari,adalah tiga kawan yang karib.nama mereka ialah Gaduh,Otak dan Gila.Tiba-tiba Gaduh telah hilang,lalu Otak dan Gila pun laporkan kepada polis yang bertugas.

Gila:polis, saya nak cari Gaduh
Polis:awak ni Gilakah?
Gila:ya
Polis:mana Otak awak?
Gila:Otak saya diluar.


BY ANONYMOUS

SELUAR DALAM...

Pada satu hari, si suami balik dari kerja dan mendapati si isteri tengah bergaduh besar dengan maid indonesianya. .. maka si suami dengan hati yg suci ingin lah jadi org PBB jap, nak tolong damaikan suasana.. maka bertanyalah si suami ngan suara yg lembut pada isterinya..Apa hal ni!!!!!
Yang... . kenapa bising2 ni"... ..jawap si isteri dgn nada marah... "ni hah!!!!! seluar dalam i hilang, tentu si Tuti(nama ni rekaan semata2) yang curi seluar dalam Gucci i yg mahal yg i beli kat Beijing tuhh!!! " Disambut pulak oleh si suami ... ." alahai Yang ni, takkan lah sebab hilang satu helai seluar dalam pun nak bising se kawasan perumahan. Dah, dah,nanti Abang belikan ganti yg lebih mahal dan seksi lagi... " Berkata lagi si isteri... "Tapi bang, kalu sehelai i tak sakit hati sangat, ni yang hilang tu , 10 helai tau... ... 10 helai!!! (sambil tunjuk jari sepuluhnya)" Maka terkejut beruklah si suami dengar berita ini, berpusing lah dia pada Tuti yg terkebil2 sejak tadi... dgn suara yg lebih lembut lagi ,si suami bertanya... ."betul ke Tuti, kamu yang curi seluar dalam mak encik kamu ? Ingat... .kamu mesti bercakap benar!!!" Si Tuti dengan muka yang ketakutan dan suara terketar2 yg pekat dgn pelat indonesianya pun menjawaplah. .. . " tapi... tapi... tapi... bapak kan tahu saya enggak pernah pakai seluar dalam!!!!! "

BY ANONYMOUS

BLUE HEAVEN!!!!!

It's gonna be BLUE OF THIS YEAR!!!!!!

THE POWER OF INTERNET

Badminton Joke - Simply "Bad Minton"!

Badminton Joke - Simply "Bad Minton"!

Well, when it comes to badminton jokes there are plenty of them available online as well as offline.

However, as a ground reality we know finding a good badminton joke can be a real challenging task especially when finding offline or in printed formats, as you may have to search for several books, magazines or other literature.

Whereas, the online world is really different, as you can easily find numerous badminton jokes online these days. Contrary to the recent past, these days there are many online websites that are especially dedicated to jokes. Depending upon your choice you can search for different jokes in different categories, such as cricket jokes, tennis jokes and even badminton jokes.

No doubt, badminton is a serious racket game that requires a lot of stamina and practice to win the game, but there is something unique in it to make it a funny sport. Though, as far as quality is concerned, you may not be able to find a really funny joke, cartoon or picture so easily. But still there are a lot of badminton funny cartoons and pictures available on the Internet.

Those who have a little knowledge know that cartoons about the sport of badminton have a long history associated with them. One of the most famous and recorded badminton funny cartoons was published by Punch magazine in the year 1854.

Let's come back to badminton jokes. One of the most simple and short badminton jokes could be "Bad Minton". Badminton is unquestionably a very popular sport around the world. Perhaps there is something really funny in the name itself, e.g. there are many terms and accessories associated with the sport that make this sport a funny one, such as "shuttlecock", "shuttle", "cock", "love all", "service over" and "change ends" etc.

Jokes are jokes; they can come in any form or type, so it all depends upon who says and what, and in what circumstances. For example, it is said that in order to score in badminton a player must place his cock in his opponent's court with thrust. It is really funny when it is generally said that in badminton a player may only handle the cock before serving or after scoring.

I still remember, when a childhood friend of mine once said, "If a player does not get the cock into his opponents court for any reason then he does not score and cannot try again until he has service again."

I am sure, everybody who in some form or other is related to badminton sport, knows that in badminton damaged cocks aren't used as this can cause irritation to the court surface. No doubt, courts are delicate so should be handled with utmost care and delicacy. Therefore it is sometimes said that rubber covers (of course in badminton) are highly advised for safety as they are about 99% less likely to damage the court.

Wise people say beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. So true, especially when it comes to jokes. There are many people who may not laugh even at decent jokes, whereas there are people who would start bursting at some simple lines. If you don't believe then see these lines:

"Courts with worn or damaged patches should not be used for at least two weeks."

"We don't need new balls in badminton."

UBER CUP

The Uber Cup, an international team competition for ladies on the lines of the Thomas Cup was first mooted early in 1950. Mrs H S Uber suggested and offered a trophy to the IBF but the competition was not considered at that time due to financial constraints.

Finally in 1953, the institution of the Uber Cup was agreed upon in principle. Mrs. Uber's kind offer was gratefully accepted and it was agreed that the inaugural contest should take place over 1956-57.

Mrs. Uber made the official presentation of her trophy at the annual General Meeting of the Federation of 1956 and she herself made the draw for the inaugural contest. The Uber Cup is a beautiful piece of silver of unusual design. Surmounted over a swiveling globe stands a lady player on a shuttle.

The trophy is 18 inches in height and was manufactured to Mrs. Uber own design by Messrs. Mappin & Webb, of London. Engraved around the base of the trophy are the words, 'The ladies International Badminton Championships Challenge Trophy presented to the International Badminton Federation by Mrs. H S Uber, 1956.'

The competition is now held every two years with a format of 3 singles and 2 doubles.Here is a list of past Uber Cup winners:



Year Champion

1957 United States

1960 United States

1963 United States

1966 Japan

1969 Japan

1972 Japan

1975 Indonesia

1978 Japan

1981 Japan

1984 China

1986 China

1988 China

1990 China

1992 China

1994 Indonesia

1996 Indonesia

1998 China

2000 China

2002 China

2004 China

THOMAS CUP

The Thomas Cup

The Thomas Cup story began in England nearly 70 years ago when an English nobleman, having himself derived much pleasure from Badminton, decided to leave something for posterity.

That man was the wealthy baronet of Yapton,Sir George Alan Thomas, after whom the cup is named. A leading player of the English Badminton scene for more than two decades, Sir George had between 1903 and 1927 won an impressive record number of All-England championships, including the singles titles for four successive years.

Sir George has envisaged a world cup championship for Badminton similar to that for football, instituted in 1930. His idea was well received by the International Badminton Federation, IBF.

In 1939, Sir George presented to the IBF the handsome Cup, a shinning 28 inch gold-plated trophy hammered in silver. Engraved on the front of the Cup are the words, 'The International Badminton Championship Cup presented to the International Badminton Federation by Sir George Thomas, Bart., 1939'.

Due to world war two, it was not until 1948 that the first contest for the Thomas Cup could be launched. Initially, The Thomas Cup was played every three years. Since 1982, the Tournament has been every two years with a format of 3 singles and 2 doubles. Here is a list of past Thomas Cup winners:



Year Champion

1949 Malaya

1952 Malaya

1955 Malaya

1958 Indonesia

1961 Indonesia

1964 Indonesia

1967 Malaysia

1970 Indonesia

1973 Indonesia

1976 Indonesia

1979 Indonesia

1982 China

1984 Indonesia

1986 China

1988 China

1990 China

1992 Malaysia

1994 Indonesia

1996 Indonesia

1998 Indonesia

2000 Indonesia

2002 Indonesia

2004 China